A Rough Start
by freeatlas
Summary: AU&OOC:All Human: When Edward unexpectedly runs into his ex-girlfriend, the woman he's been pining after for the last three years, he is shocked to discover the hardships she has been through in his absence. And since when does she have a daughter? R
1. Prologue: 3 Years Ago

**Disclaimer**: Don't own Twilight

**BPOV**

I heard the faint turn of the lock, and took a deep breath, steeling myself for what I was about to do. My heart still ached at just the thought of the words I was about to say, but enough is enough.

I heard his footsteps across the threshold and looked expectantly at the doorway where he would soon pass.

I took a moment to admire his still form as he paused under the door frame looking at me with a quizzical expression on his face. His hair was as messy as ever, the bronze locks settling wherever they pleased. My eyes followed the contours of his face, the square of his jaw, the bone structure of his cheekbones, his lips, and finally his green eyes, which were filled currently confusion.

After a few minutes of silence, he finally asked me, "Why are you all dressed up at this hour?"

I sighed. This reaction wasn't unexpected, but a part of me had hoped that upon seeing me he would have immediately realized his mistake and begun apologizing. But I suppose it was better this way; as it served to strengthen my current resolve.

"Edward," I asked softly, "do you know what today is?"

I watched patiently as his brow furrowed in confusion. I could see him mentally checking things off in his head. Finally he looked up at me, the confusion still evident in his eyes.

"The fifth of February?"

I sighed and bitter tears threatened to fill my eyes. I took a deep breath. It hurt. I knew this was coming, but it still hurt.

"It's our two year anniversary Edward" I told him, my head still bowed. "We were supposed to meet at that little French restaurant that I've always wanted to go to. Remember? We made reservations a few weeks ago."

I heard his sharp intake of breath and I looked up to see an apologetic expression on his face.  
"Bella," he began, "I'm so sorry. I completely forgot. Emmett called and he had tickets to--"

I cut him off before he could finish. I didn't want to know what tickets he had replaced me with. "It's fine Edward. It really doesn't matter anymore anyway." I watched his face carefully. He was obviously confused by my reaction. I'm sure he had expected a tongue-lashing, but I was too tired to give it to him.

"What do you mean it doesn't matter anymore?" he asked carefully.

I sighed, looking down again. Taking a deep breath I forced to myself to say the words that would separate us officially.

"I'm tired Edward," I began softly, looking up into his eyes. "I'm tired of sitting by the phone all day waiting for you to call me, I'm tired of the looks of pity I get from waiters at restaurants when you don't show up, I'm tired of waiting for you to show up. For two years I have put up with always coming in third in your life behind your work and your friends; but I'm done with that now." I paused, waiting to gauge his reaction.

He took my momentary silence to break in. "Wait, are you breaking up with me?" he asked in disbelief.

I laughed, but it was short and bitter. "Breaking up with you? Edward, in order to break up with someone you have to be in a relationship with them. I was just the girl you called when you got bored."

He cringed. I knew it was harsh, but it needed to be said. "Look Edward, you're a great guy," I continued on in a softer tone. "And we've had some really great times together, I'm not denying that, but we want two very different things in life. And you've made it perfectly clear that you have no interest in starting a family. I should have ended this sooner, when you first made your intentions clear, but a part of me hoped that I could be the one to change you, to make you want to settle down. It was a foolish hope, I can see that now."

I stood up grabbing my duffel bag which contained all the things of mine that had made their way into his apartment over the two years we had been seeing each other.

Walking over to him, my heart gave a tug at the sad expression on his face. I reached up and softly cupped his cheek.

"Like I said before Edward, you are a great guy. I'm just not the girl that's going to make you commit."

"Is there anyway I can convince you to give me another chance," he asked, his voice pleading.

My hand dropped from his face and I took a step backward. How badly I wanted to say yes, but I forced myself to remember all the lonely nights I'd spent waiting for him.

"You know that would be pointless. I think it would be best to just say that we had some good times together and leave it at that."

I turned to walk toward the door, but he caught my hand in his. "Please Bella," he whispered softly.

"No Edward," I responded, removing my hand from his grasp, "You've been quote on quote trying to change for the last six months since I first had this conversation with you, and it didn't do any good. I'm sorry, but I'm done."

With that I turned the door knob and walked out the door. As I turned around to shut the door behind me, I watched for the last time as he ran his fingers through his hair, like he did when he was upset and didn't know what to do. His expression broke my heart, but not my resolve.

"Goodbye Edward," I murmured softly and with that I shut the door.

* * *

A/N: Playlist: Sia: Taken for Granted 


	2. Coffee and Memories

**Disclaimer**: Don't own Twilight

**EPOV**

I closed my eyes and leaned back in my chair, my hands reaching up to slide over my face. I wanted to pound my head into my desk right now, or better yet, chuck the phone out the window. It had been ringing non-stop for the past couple of hours and I could feel a headache coming on. The company I had started with my brother several years ago was booming. We had never thought that it would ever do this well, and now we had more clients than we had ever dreamed of when we had first opened our private contracting company.

Fortunately we had made some really good choices in employees, among them one Jasper Whitlock. A law school graduate who didn't enjoy spending all day in a courtroom, he had really helped get our little business on its feet. Emmet and I practically considered him a brother since we had met five years ago. It was Bella who had introduced us. She had met him at the bookstore she worked at while she was finishing up her bachelor's at University of Washington and Emmett and I were just starting our company.

He had come into the store looking for a book on the civil war, and when she found out he was a recent law school grad she had taken it upon herself to introduce him to us. His charisma caught both the attention of Emmett and I and Bella had positively beamed when we invited him to join us in our business endeavor over dinner that very night.

Bella . . . the name ran through my head. It had been about three years since the night that she had walked out of my life, and it had taken me six months to work up the courage to go beg for her to come back. But by then it had been too late; she was gone. Her apartment empty and her phone disconnected. I had tried calling her parents but neither knew exactly where she was. All they knew was that she had decided to do a little soul searching, but she checked in with them every couple of days.

I had made them both promise to tell her that I had called, and I had latched myself onto my phone for the next couple of weeks. But she had never called. I hadn't been in a steady relationship since her. I realized too late that she was everything I had been looking for.

I shook my head trying to dispel the gloomy thoughts. I tried not to dwell on her, but she was always in the back of my mind. I couldn't stop the thoughts of her creeping in whenever I passed a bookstore.

"Ugh," I groaned, banging my head on the desk.

"Uh, is this a bad time Edward?" I heard Emmett ask from his place at the door.

I looked up to see Emmett smirking at me from the doorway, he was obviously trying to contain his laughter.

I dropped my head into my hands before I responded. "Yeah, I'm fine. But I swear if Reed calls one more time to ask me about whether or not we get our concrete from China or from the US, I just might go down and shoot him myself."

Emmett's booming laugh filled my office. "Hey, don't hate the guy for showing his American pride. Just remember how much we're charging him for all the home grown supplies. Trust me, it'll make you feel better," he said with a laugh.

At that I had to crack a smile, because it was true. He was paying twice as much sometimes to have all American made products. We had tried explaining that fact to him on several occasions, but unfortunately in the business world the customer is always right, no matter how stupid he may be.

"Why don't you take a break, go get some coffee. You look like hell," Emmett continued on.

"Gee thanks, bro. You really know how to boost my self-esteem," I said with a laugh, as I stood up stretching my arms above me. Coffee did sound good right now.

"Do you want me to bring you back anything?" I asked as I grabbed my coat and made my way to the door.

"Just the number of some chick you pick up along the way. Blond preferably," he said with a grin.

I laughed. My coffee trips were infamous around the office, since I always came back with a number to add to my little black book I had started to keep a couple of years ago.

"I'm going to tell Rosalie you said that," I said with a smirk.

He just laughed in response. He and Rosalie had been married for a year now, and the saying a match made in heaven definitely applied to them. What made his comment so ironic was that I had in fact picked up her number on one of my coffee trips, given it to Emmett and the rest was history.

* * *

I stood in front of the doors to a little coffee shop. I hadn't meant to come here, but it was where my feet had just naturally led me. It was the coffee shop where I had met her. She had tripped and spilled her coffee all over me. I don't think I've ever seen anyone's face turn so red. I hardly even noticed the burning sensation on my chest as I watched her stumble over her words in apology. Before I even realized what I was doing, I had asked her out to dinner. 

I hadn't been inside these doors since we had broken up. Hell, I had never even walked by the place but here I was standing outside, looking like an idiot I'm sure, staring at the doors.

_Come on, it's been three years. Time to move on,_ I told myself. Reaching for the door handle I pulled it open and walked in.

The place hadn't changed much in the last three years. Some new furniture and some new machines behind the counter, but the atmosphere was the same: relaxing and simple. I noticed with sadness the loveseat that Bella and I used to curl up on together had been replaced.

I turned to walk up to the counter determined to put Bella out of mind. A cute strawberry blond waitress was behind the counter, Tanya, according to her name tag.

"Hello," she said with a sultry smile, "what can I do for you today?" I could see her sizing me up with her eyes.

Usually I liked this forwardness in women. It meant that they were looking for the same thing I was; a good time and nothing more. But for some reason, it made me cringe this time. Maybe because this had been our place, and I felt like I was betraying Bella in some way.

"Coffee," I said shortly, "black."

Her smile fell slightly and she looked a little disappointed, but she none the less quickly filled my order.

"Come back soon," she said in parting.

"Thank you," I replied as I turned to leave. As soon as the cold wind hit my face outside of the store, I immediately felt better; the wind blowing away the memories that lingered in the air. Glancing down at the receipt I noticed her little note: _If you want to relax, give me a call—Tanya. _Underneath she had written her number.

I smiled as I pushed the memories of Bella out of mind. Maybe all I needed was a blond for myself.


	3. Do Something Already

**A/N: This chapter sets the stage for Bella and Edward to cross paths again. Next chapter you'll find out what Bella has been up to for the past three years.**

**Disclaimer:** Don't own Twilight

**EPOV**

I made my way back to the office, coffee in hand and a smirk on my face. Jasper passed me on my way in and upon seeing the coffee cup knew immediately what the smirk was for.

"Let me guess," he said with a shake of his head, "another phone number for the allusive Edward Cullen."

"You betcha," I said with a laugh.

Emmett came bounding out into the hallway. "So what's the verdict?" he asked with a gleam in his eyes.

"Strawberry blond with a coke bottle figure," I said with a grin.

Emmett laughed gleefully and held out his hand to Jasper who pulled out his wallet with a sigh. Slapping a five dollar bill into Emmett's outstretched hand, he shook his head belatedly. "I could of sworn you preferred brunettes Edward," he complained.

And just like that, Bella was back in my mind. The memory of her long mahogany locks taunting me in my head.

"I used too," I snapped at him, frustrated that such a simple statement could bring back so many regrets, and stormed back into my office.

Shutting the door, more like slamming it actually, I breathed in deeply pinching the bridge of nose with my thumb and forefinger. Why? Why is she always on my mind as of late?

It was a rhetorical question really. I already knew the answer; it was as simple as it was obvious. I missed her. I missed everything about her. I missed her laugh and being the one to make her smile. I missed the spark that came into her eyes whenever she saw me. I missed the feel of her skin beneath my hands and the way the silky locks of her hair would tickle my chest as we laid in bed together.

But most of all I missed having her as a companion. There were never awkward silences between us. We could talk about everything and anything together. I had never met anyone whose company I enjoyed more or who I felt more comfortable with. I could be myself around her without any fear of judgment.

Unfortunately, I had taken it all for granted. It was her compassion and patience that had kept us together for so long, not anything I had done. She had waited two years for me to properly appreciate her and realize just how amazing she truly was. But I had been too caught up in my own selfish desires to recognize it.

I still remembered with chagrin the words that she said to me the night that she had left. I had deserved every single one of them. And as if her words weren't bad enough I had opened the fridge later that night to discover that she had prepared a week's worth of homemade dinners, stored and labeled, for me to enjoy. Even as she had said goodbye, she was still looking out for me. I had stared at the fridge for hours, my heart aching and my head running through all the things that I had done wrong by her. I didn't open up my fridge for a month after that. I couldn't bring myself to face the guilt that washed over me every time I did.

Despite all my efforts to put her out of mind, a part of her was always with me, reminding me of just how much I had lost on that fateful evening.

Sighing I sat down at my desk putting my head in my hands. It was then that I realized I was still holding the receipt with Tanya's number on it. Disgusted, I crumpled it up and threw it into the trash, before plopping my head back into my hands.

I heard the door to my office slowly open and then close again, but I didn't bother looking up until I felt a hand onto my shoulder.

Looking up, my eyes met Emmett's worried ones.

"You still love her, don't you," he asked softly.

I nodded glumly. Not trusting myself to respond.

"Not that it is any of my business," he continued on, "but why don't you go after her? You've been pining after her for all these years, but you haven't done anything about it. Why not?"

"I don't deserve her," I said quietly.

"That's bullshit Edward and you know it," Emmett said vehemently. "You're too afraid to go after her because you're afraid that she's already moved on. You're afraid to find her in the arms of another man."

"And so what if I am," I retorted, standing up to face him. "So what if I'm afraid to find out that she found someone who could love her and appreciate her like I should have? Becase your right, I don't want to see her with anyone else, it would hurt me more than anything to know that I didn't have even the hope of a chance with her. But even if I did find her still single what right do I have to ask her to take me back? I wasted two years of her life because of my selfish behavior. What right do I have to ask her for more time?"

" Because you love her," Emmett answered, as if it were obvious. "You're right. You wasted two years of her life. But just because you royally screwed up once doesn't mean you'll do it again."

"It doesn't matter," I responded pitifully. "I won't put her in that position. I refuse to hurt her more than I already have."

"But that's what I'm trying to tell you," Emmett argued back. "I don't think you could ever hurt her, not like that again. Do you really not trust yourself to blow again?"

I ran a hand through my hair. "I don't know Emmett. I just don't want to hurt her anymore than I already have."

Emmett shook his head at me. "Look Edward," he said determinedly, "for the last three years I've watched you try to get over her, and it doesn't take a genius to see that every method has failed. You want her just as much now, if not more, as you did when you first called looking for her. Give yourself a second chance. Who knows, she might even still be waiting for you. But if you wait any longer, your odds will just get worse and worse."

I smiled, but it didn't reach my eyes. "Thanks Emmett," I said gratefully. "I'll think about what you said, but I'm not making any promises."

That response seemed to satisfy him, even though I could tell he wasn't completely convinced. He nodded and headed back out into the hallway.

"Oh, don't forget," he said, pausing at the door, "you have to go meet with the board at the University of Washington tomorrow at eleven. Be sure to be on your best behavior too, because getting the contracting job for the new building on campus will be huge for the company."

"Emmett, when have I ever lost a deal?" I asked with a smirk, but really just grateful for the subject change.

"You know," he said with a grin, "I seem to recall a certain incident, at a certain bar, with a certain wo-"

"Alright, point taken, point taken," I said cutting him off with a cringe.

He laughed wickedly and shut the door to my office, once again leaving me alone with my thoughts about a brown-eyed girl.


	4. Fateful Meetings

**Disclaimer: **Don't own Twilight

**BPOV**

I sat straight up when my alarm went off in the morning. The annoying computerized voice that screeched out of the speakers telling me what time it was didn't make the whole waking up process anymore enjoyable. Throwing back the covers I carefully placed my feet on the floor. Using my hands as a guide I carefully made my bed, tightly tucking the loose sheets in. I tapped my alarm clock to hear the time, before counting my steps to the bathroom, and trailing my hand along the wall to safely make my way there.

I didn't bother to turn on the light, it's not like I needed it. I sighed, realizing that it had been almost two and a half years to the day since the car accident that had robbed me of my sight. Memories of that day ran through my head as I stood in the shower, letting the hot water fall over me, relaxing the tense muscles in my back. Everything in my life had changed in just a few short seconds.

It was the night I had finally decided to tell Edward about the pregnancy. I had found out I was expecting just a few weeks after I had left him that night, but was too afraid to tell him. While he was too much of a gentleman to not take me back, he had made it clear while we were dating that he had no interest in starting a family. It was for that reason that I feared his resentment toward not only myself, but towards my child, when we unintentionally forced him to settle down.

I had fled the Seattle area, fearing that he would find me and transferred to Washington State University to finish my Master's in English Literature in order to avoid him at all costs. I was almost eight months pregnant when my parents had informed me that he had been calling looking for me, and I had made a snap decision to tell him. But I had never made it to his apartment, or even into Seattle for that matter. For on the highway leading to Seattle, a truck driver had fallen asleep behind the wheel and rammed into my car from behind. The last thing I remembered seeing was the bright lights in my rear view mirror before my head slammed into the steering wheel when the airbag failed to deploy and then everything went black.

I shuddered out the memory and into reality realizing I had probably spent more time in the shower than I should have. I quickly rinsed my hair and shut the water off, before continuing on with my daily morning routine. Tapping my clock to hear the time once I was ready, I realized I probably only had a few second before Emmaline woke up. As if on cue I heard the tell tale signs of her waking. The rustle of sheets, the little whimpers, all followed by soft pitter patter of little feet across the hallway. I followed the sounds of her footsteps slowly, so as not to accidently run into her. I soon felt her little hands grabbing onto the side of my skirt.

"Good morning Emmaline," I whispered softly, as I found a good grip on her and hoisted her gently into my arms. Her body was limp against mine, her head resting on my chest and I heard her yawn out a mumble. I kissed her soft curls and carefully trailed the back of my hand along the hallway to help myself safely find the kitchen. Alice and I had just moved into this apartment a few weeks ago and I was still orienting myself to it. I had a few bruises on my legs from being careless around the furniture and wasn't looking to add any more.

Once I had located her high chair and carefully strapped her in, I pulled her juice out from its spot in the fridge and handed it to her. I was just pulling out the box of Cherrios out for her when I heard the door open and the sound of soft and graceful footsteps across the threshold, that could only belong to Alice.

"Good morning Alice," I called from my place at the kitchen pantry, "how was the gym this morning?"

"Alright I guess," she replied with a sigh, "I woke up later than I usually do and I had to cut my work-out short."

I heard her making kissing noises before she said in her chipper voice, "Good morning, Emmaline. How's my favorite niece doing?

Alice wasn't Emmaline's real aunt but she might as well have been. Alice and I had met in Florida when I had moved back in with my mother following mine and Emmaline's release from the hospital in Washington. As a new member to the world of the blind I was poorly equipped to take care of myself, let alone a newborn, so Renaee had offered to help me get back on my feet. Alice had been my Orientation and Mobility instructor, teaching me everything from using a cane to simply walking in a straight line. We had hit it off right away, becoming best friends in a few short weeks and her love of Emmaline had inadvertently christened her "Auntie Alice."

When we had both been offered jobs to help get a new program for the blind on its feet at the University of Washington, she hadn't hesitated to offer to be my roommate and help me see to Emmaline's needs.

"Bella," Alice called out to me, interrupting me from my thoughts, "don't forget we are meeting with the contractor and the board this morning in order to discuss the designing of the new building. So . . . do you mind if I put your hair up for you?"

I snorted in response. "Like you really have to ask Alice. Even if I said no, you would force me into a chair armed with a curling iron and hairspray."

She laughed at my antics. "Yes," she replied in all innocence, "but I like to leave the illusion of free choice. It helps my 'Alice make-over' victims feel like they have some control over their destiny."

I shook my head, a laugh escaping from my throat. "Funny such a tyrannical personality lies within a woman often described as being a pixie fairy. You just proof that looks can be deceiving," I accused.

"But with that revelation in mind, I shall willingly obey your makeover demands this morning," I added.

She clapped her hands in excitement just as the doorbell rang.

"That'll be Angela," I said, "you better let her in."

Angela was one of Emmaline's nannies, of sorts. Since I couldn't see to all Emmaline's needs and she needed constant watching at this stage in life I had hired Angela and Jessica to help me take care of her. _One of the joys of being crippled,_ I thought a little bitterly.

They came over Moday through Friday, and whenever else they were needed, splitting the morning and evening shifts between them. I got along well with both of them, although Jessica was a little chatty for my taste. Both were undergrads at the University of Washington, so they lived very close by.

I soon heard the distinct sound of Angela's footsteps approaching me from behind.

"Hello Angela," I said without turning around, "You are just in time. I was just about to give Emmaline her breakfast."

"How did you know it was me and not Alice?" Angela asked with laugh.

I turned around, facing where the sound of her voice had come from. "Oh, I have my ways," I answered with a grin. "But if you really must know, I can tell you apart from Alice by your footsteps. Your walk is steady, whereas Alice's is more sporadic . . . you know, just like her personality."

"I heard that," Alice called from somewhere in the apartment.

"And you have yet to deny it," I retaliated.

Fairly soon we were back to our usual morning routine, Angela helping me feed Emmaline and get her ready to go, while Alice got herself ready. The only difference was that this morning my poor hair fell victim to one of Alice's makeovers.

* * *

I held my cane in my left hand, while my right hand gripped Alice's arm just above the elbow, as she led me through the crowded hallway. We must have been a sight to see, a four foot ten pixie leading a five foot four blind girl. Usually I hated using her as a sighted guide, I liked using what little independence my cane gave me, but we were in a hurry at the moment, and this was faster. 

"Why do I have to meet with the contractor anyway," I grumbled to Alice as we hurried down the hallway. "I mean I can understand why they want someone who is blind to help the contractor with the design, but why me? I've been blind for less than three years, don't they want someone more . . . I don't know . . . experienced?"

"I think that's kind of the point," Alice replied, "they want this building to be as sensitive as possible. That's why they want someone who has just recently had to make the adjustment."

"Great," I replied sarcastically, "now I'm blind among the blind."

Alice laughed and I could practically hear her eyeballs roll. "Alright missy, quit your whining, haven't I taught you better than that?"

I bowed my head jokingly. "I bow my head in apology for insulting you, oh Great OM," I mocked her using my favorite nickname for her.

Her bell like laughter rang out and I could tell from the echo of our footsteps that we were approaching the end of a hallway. She came to a slow stop allowing me to gather my bearings before she rapped smartly on the closed door in front of us.

The door opened quickly, and I heard a deep male voice say, "Aw, Miss Brandon and Miss Swan, thank you for joining us to give us your expertise in this area."

I felt Alice nudge me slightly, a cue to let me know I should hold out my hand for a handshake. I did so and it was immediately grasped by a strong masculine one.

"Dr. Brenn, I presume," I said as I shook his hand.

"Of course, but how did you know it was me," he asked politely.

"I recognized your voice from the message you left on my machine," I replied simply.

Introductions were made and soon Alice maneuvered me so that my knees hit a chair allowing me sit on my own. The conversation continued but it was difficult for me to follow with all the new voices jumbling together. I was able to gather, however, that we were waiting for a representative from the contracting company to arrive before we began the meeting.

Only a few more minutes passed before there was another knock at the door.

"That would be the contractor," Dr. Brenn announced.

I heard the door open again and the words that were spoken next sent my pulse hammering through my veins and left my face pale and my hands clammy.

"Hello, I'm Edward Cullen," a silky voice announced from the doorway. "I have an appointment regarding the contracting of the new building for this campus."

I very nearly fainted on the spot.

* * *

A/N: I am so sorry that I didn't get this out sooner, but one of my midterms this week was giving me a run for my money. I hope to have another chapter out by Sunday, but I don't want to make any promises I can't keep. Please review and let me know what you think! Reviews make me HAPPY! 


	5. Decisions, Decisions

**A/N: **Thank you so much to all of you who reviewed! It really means a lot to me! Enjoy this next chapter.

P.S.: By the way: OM stands of Orientation and Mobility –thanks for reviews from the beginning Topaz Tears!

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Twilight

**BPOV**

I swear I stopped breathing. My mind was reeling from this, I couldn't handle this. I felt myself start to hyperventilate, when a small hand grabbed mine.

"Bella," Alice whispered in my ear, "you need to calm down. It won't help the situation if you pass out. Breathe in and out for me now."

I concentrated on breathing in and out. I could hear the introductions being made, but I couldn't understand them. I vaguely wondered if it was possible for a blind person to suffer from vertigo.

I felt Alice lean toward me again as she asked, "I'm guessing by your reaction that this is _the_ Edward Cullen?"

I simply turned toward her, letting the terrified expression that I'm sure graced my face answer her question. She squeezed my hand gently, reassuring me that I was not alone.

I snapped out of it when I heard someone say my name.

"And this is Bella Swan. She teaches English here at the University, along with an introductory course for Braille. We've asked her along with Alice Brandon, an Orientation and Mobility instructor, to give the architects some assistance in designing a building that will be provide the visually impaired with a very comfortable learning environment."

Alice nudged me to cue me for me to stand up and to again hold my hand out. I shakily stood to my feet, stretching my hand out as a million and one question ran through my mind. Should I act like I've never met him before? Or should I act like were old friends? I made a split second decision to simply let him take the lead.

I felt a large, warm hand grasp mine, and an electric current ran up my arm. I sighed involuntarily. In the last three years apart, I had forgotten what a comfort his touch was. I felt him raise my hand up followed by the sensation of his lips brushing against my knuckles. I fought back a shiver and felt myself blush furiously at his actions. Apparently Edward was just as smooth now as he was three years ago.

"It's so good to see you again Bella," he said softly, releasing my hand.

I smiled a small smile, "Well I wish I could say the same, but it looks as though you'll be doing all the seeing in this situation."

There was a stunned silence following that statement, and I wondered if my sarcasm wasn't appreciated by anyone but myself. But then I heard him chuckle. It was a forced chuckle, but I was probably only the one who could pick up on that. I surprised myself that even after all these years I still knew his voice and knew it well.

"I see your sarcasm is still alive and well," he finally said.

"You two know each other?" It was Dr. Brenn who asked that.

"Yes," I replied, "from a few years back." I didn't say anything more; I wanted to just leave it at that. No one needed to know the intimate details of our past relationship.

"Well, this will make working together much easier for the both of you," Dr. Brenn said.

"What?" I asked taken aback. This was news to me, and working with him would be a huge complication. Then realizing how rude my voice had been, I tried to back track. "I mean, I thought that I would be working with the architects," I added lamely.

It was Edward who responded. "Well, the main architect we will be referring to for this project is none other than Emmett's wife, and since we will have a budget to work off of we will need to be watching the plans to make sure they are financially realistic."

Oh. Well that made sense. Wait a second . . . "Did you just say Emmett's wife?" I asked in disbelief.

At this he laughed, and the sound of it made my knees weak. Cursing myself for my weakness, I reached out for the edge of my chair to support myself, the coldness of the wood helping me to keep reality in check.

"Yes," he replied, the sound of his laughter lingering in his words, "Emmett did in fact get married. Her name in Rosalie, and honestly can say I don't know which one I feel more sorry for."

I heard someone clear their throat beside us, before Dr. Brenn interjected, "Sorry to interrupt but we do have a lot to discuss this morning, so if we can continue on with introductions . . ." he stuttered off.

"Of course, it seems as though we'll have plenty of time to catch up in the future," Edward assured him smoothly. Was it just my imagination, or did he sound excited about that prospect?

The introductions continued on and I carefully sat back in the seat. Alice reclaimed my hand with a gentle squeeze again once she had been introduced. I was glad she was here, her steady presence allowed me keep myself from falling apart. I tried to keep a calm exterior but on the inside I was panicking. This was the last place I had ever expected to run into Edward.

Dr. Brenn had finished with the introductions and I was vaguely aware of him beginning to explain the inspiration behind this building. He mentioned something about an extremely large private donation being given with the condition that it be put toward a college for the blind. The University decided to take the challenge and build a brand new building and design a brand new program for it as well. The goal was to make the building a comfortable place for the visually impaired to receive a higher education.

He continued to talk going into detail the prestige this new program and building would bring the University, but I was barely paying attention. All I could think about was what I was going to say to Edward the next time we spoke. How was I going to tell him about Emmaline and more importantly what would his reaction be?

I started going through all the worst possible scenarios; yelling and screaming reactions were running through my head like a broken track record. I felt myself filling with despair with each passing minute as I began to realize just what letting Edward back into my life would mean, even if it was just business. A simple touch of his hand, and the silky caress of his voice had been enough to let me know that even after all these years I was still in love with him. But he had been so smooth earlier, not even a tremor in his voice, that I knew meeting each other again did not mean as much to him as it did to me.

I still hadn't made a decision on what information to share with him, when Dr. Brenn brought the meeting to a close, thanking everyone for coming, and to my dismay inviting Edward to stay and talk to Alice and I. The panic was going to overwhelming me, my flight instincts taking over.

Alice grip on my hand was becoming painful but I latched on to it, desperate to hold my emotions in check. I heard the rustling of clothing and the murmurs of the people around us as they made their way out the door.

"And then there were three," a voice beside me whispered softly.

I nearly jumped out of my skin. I hadn't heard him approach and certainly hadn't expected him to be so close. He immediately started apologizing.

"I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to startle. I just forgot that . . ." he trailed off, stumbling over his response. I couldn't help but smile. Imagine the smooth operator that was Edward Cullen being at a loss for words.

"That I was blind," I said finishing his sentence for him.

He let out a breath slowly, before speaking again. "What happened Bella? When did this happen to you?" his voice was strained.

"About two and half years ago," I replied, my voice subdued. "A truck driver fell asleep and hit me hard from behind. When my airbag failed to go off, my head slammed into the steering wheel and well, you can see the consequences of that."

There was a pause. I could almost hear the wheels turning in his head as he processed what I had just told him.

"Why didn't you tell me?" he finally asked.

I blanched and blanked all at the same time. That was not a question I had been expecting. I finally gathered myself enough to answer. "We had broken up Edward. I didn't see a reason to."

The minute I said it, I regretted it. It was a lie, a big one at that. There had been every reason to call him, I was pregnant with his child for crying out loud. But it had been fear that overwhelming fear of his resentment that had kept me from involving him.

I heard his sharp intake of breath, and knew immediately that he was neither happy nor satisfied with my response. But I was not ready to give him anything else.

Fortunately, Alice took this pause in the conversation to jump in and save my skin. "I'm sorry to interrupt but Bella and I have classes to attend to in a little bit. Could we set up a time to meet later to discuss the building plans?"

Oh, how I love Alice. She had found a way to by me time, because I was not ready for this conversation with Edward yet, not ready at all.

I heard him sigh before he replied, his voice a little rough, "Sure. Let me give you the address to our building. Could you the two of you meet with us sometime tomorrow afternoon?"

"Is two o' clock okay?" Alice asked.

"That's fine. I meet you at the front and show you the way in." I could hear the scratching of pen on paper as he said this, followed by the sound of his footsteps and the click of the door as it opened.

But before the door closed behind him, I heard him say, "Oh, and Bella? This conversation is not over."

And with that he left.

I waited until I had heard the door close and counted to ten in my head. Satisfied that he was not coming back I let go of all the pent up emotions within me. As the tears began to fall, I felt Alice pull me into a hug, the sobs now ripping freely, albeit painfully, from my chest.

* * *

I was holding Emmaline in my arms, humming softly and rocking her to sleep. Alice hadn't questioned me about the subject of Edward Cullen all day, knowing that I needed some time to think, but I knew she was growing impatient. 

I felt Emmaline's breathing grow steady and knew that she had fallen asleep. I held her tightly in my arms, burying my face in her curls, the same color as her father's according to the descriptions of everyone who could see her. I breathed in deeply, so grateful that she had survived the accident. It had been her that had truly helped me through the first terrible months of being blind.

Holding her and feeling her safe in my arms calmed me in a way that nothing else could. My daughter, my reason for existence. I had so much love for this little body in my arms. She had been the one good thing that had come out being in a relationship with Edward. I had always wanted to be a mother, and he had given me that at least, no matter how unintentional it may have been.

"She looks just like him," Alice's voice said from somewhere in front of where I sat on the couch. "She has your lips and nose, but the hair, the eyes, the smile . . . they're all his."

"I wish I could see her," I whispered softly, holding her more tightly in my embrace. "I have always wanted a family, children of my own. Little did I know I would never really _see _that happen."

"What are you going to do," Alice asked, her voice subdued. I felt the couch shift as she sat down, an arm wrapping around my shoulder.

"I don't know Alice, I really don't know," I said, the tears threatening to spill over. "All the time while we were dating he made it clear he never wanted children. I thought that it was just a phase that would pass as he got a little bit older and matured, but that never happened. Even a week before we broke up he would wrinkle his nose in disgust when we would sit near little kids at a restaurant. What if he were to do that to Emmaline?"

"It's been three years, Bella," Alice admonished me gently. "A lot can change in three years. And by the look on his face today, I would say that there has been some serious changing."

"What do you mean," I asked confused.

"Well when he first saw you," she explained, "it was nothing but pure shock, especially when he saw that you were blind. But then when he reached for your hand, the biggest smile overtook his face. Throughout the whole meeting he barely took his eyes off you; it was as if he was afraid you would disappear if he let you out of his sight."

"That doesn't necessarily mean anything Alice," I argued. "He could simply be excited to see an old friend."

"Trust me, the way he was looking at you wasn't a "friend" look, it was more like a _friendly_ look" she assured me, drawing out the word _friendly. _

I blushed at the implication she had made, but stood my ground. "Even if he still had romantic interest in me, it doesn't mean he would have any interest in having a daughter. Emmaline and I come in a package. He can't have one without the other."

"So, you're not going to tell him then, I take it," Alice asked after a pause.

I sighed. "No. Not unless I can tell that he is changed. I want to be sure that he will take us in because he _wants_ to, and not just do it out of chivalry."

Alice sighed to, and moved to get up. "Alright, I will respect your decision. But just so you know, he is her father, whether you want him to be or not. And father's have rights too."

"I know Alice," I assured her. "But she's my daughter and I'll do everything in my power to protect her, even if it means protecting her from her own father."

I kept going before Alice could interrupt. "This conversation is over. For now I will decide what is best for Emmaline. When she is older and wiser and wants to know who her father is I won't keep the information from her. But for now that decision is strictly mine. Now, will you please put her to bed for me?"

Alice sighed again, but thankfully decided not to argue more with me. "Sure Bella, whatever you need," was all she said as she carefully removed Emmaline from my arms.

I made my way to my room, and climbed into bed. But I knew I had a restless night of sleep ahead of me. My mind was completely focused on a man with green eyes.

* * *

Please Review! Let me know what you think!

Next chapter: EPOV: His reaction to seeing Bella again and their first meeting together.


	6. A Fiftieth Chance

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* * *

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**EPOV**

I walked out of the conference room in a daze. I must have gone down the wrong hallway about ten times before I finally found the right exit. All I could think about was her. By the time I made it to my car, my hands were shaking. I quickly opened the door and climbed in, leaning my head against the steering wheel as I tried to take in everything that had happened.

My first surprise walking into that conference room, was that I wasn't actually applying for the job, but rather my company had already been hired. I was extremely grateful now, that I had stayed up late a few nights ago with Rosalie and Emmet studying architecture for the visually impaired. I put a portfolio together of the ideas that we had, so I at least was fairly prepared for this first business meeting.

Everything was going smoothly until my eyes rested on her. There she was, the very woman I had been losing sleep over for the past three years; just sitting there with a terrified expression on her face. I was shocked to say the least. I stared at her amazed at how my memories of her had never done her justice. Her hair was curled into a big locks, flowing over one shoulder in a shower of mahogany. I took in her face, the slight of her cheekbones, the perfect slope of her nose, and the fullness of her lips. She was beautiful. As I looked into her eyes though, I noticed that they were looking were looking everywhere but me.

At first I was a little hurt, thinking that she didn't want to see me the way I wanted to see her, but as I studied her more carefully I noticed that her eyes didn't seem to be looking anywhere. And then I saw the walking cane she was grasping tightly in her long slender fingers. With a sudden burst of intuition I put two and two together. O_h my word, she's the blind consultant they had told us about over the phone._

Blind. The word ran through my head like a tornado; destroying every coherent thought in its path. I couldn't believe that this had happened to her, of all people. The worst of it though was that she hadn't felt the need to tell me. I chocked back a sob realizing that I wasn't important enough in her life for her to even inform me about this life altering event. If I had known I would have been there for her, stood beside her to help her through it. _But instead_, I thought ruefully, _I had been picking up numbers at coffee shops_.

I knew then what I had to do. I had to show I was a different Edward from the one she dated before. I was someone she could rely on, someone she could confide in and someone who would never let her down. Because I wasn't prepared to let go and I never would be.

I ran a finger over my lips, remembering the softness of her skin as I had kissed her hand. _Yes_, I thought with a smile, _she was the only one I could and would ever want. _Now I just had to find a way to prove myself to her.

* * *

I stood in the front of the building, impatiently waiting for Bella to arrive with her friend Alice. I hadn't gotten a wink of sleep the night before, as the hours passed by agonizingly slow. I hadn't told Jasper or Emmett about Bella being the consultant, but rather had opted to tell them to be prepared to be surprised.

I saw a yellow Porsche pull into one of the front parking spaces, and was amazed to see Alice's tiny form jump out of the front seat. The passenger side door opened, and I caught my breath as I watched Bella carefully swing her cane in front of her to help her find her footing. Alice came to stand beside her, and walked with her toward the front door. I was amazed at how well Bella appeared to be able to walk simply with the assistance of her cane. It wasn't until they got closer that I realized Bella was using Alice's voice to guide her in the right direction.

"Hello Miss Brandon," I said as I opened the door for them.

A tinkling laugh met my greeting. "Really Edward, call me Alice. I know so much about you, we're practically old friends anyway," Alice told me with a sly grin.

At these words Bella's turned bright red and she hissed at Alice under her breath. I, however, was cheered a little by the thought that Bella had at least talked about me.

I arched an eyebrow at Alice, "So Bella's talked about me with you?" If it was possible, Bella's face turned even more red.

"Why of course," Alice said, as if were obvious. "What kind of best friend would I be if I didn't know about all of her past relationships?"

I smiled in response and turned to Bella, gently taking hold of her hand to kiss it again. I held it longer than necessary, but I couldn't resist. I smiled when I saw the blush rise to her cheeks. "Quite some friend you have here Bella. She seems intent on spilling all your secrets," I chucked.

Bella sighed. "Yeah, I've noticed. Let's limit you to one secret a day, shall we Alice,"Bella asked archly.

"I'm a free spirit mate," Alice shot back imitating perfectly a southern accent.

Looking between the two of them I knew that they were having a silent argument. I wanted so badly to ask what was going on, but unfortunately it wasn't my place.

"Well," I interrupted, "let's get this meeting started, shall we?"

"Yes, let's,"Bella said in a hard voice in Alice's direction.

Alice sighed, in what looked to be defeat, and positioned herself just in front of Bella, offering her elbow. Bella took it, gripping a little hard than what was probably deemed necessary, but Alice didn't show any signs of discomfort.

Clearing my throat in an effort to relieve the tension, I began to lead the way to office we were meeting in. Just before I opened the door I decided to give Bella a bit of a warning.

"Just so you know Bella," I warned her, "Emmett and Jasper are behind these doors and they don't know that you are the one coming today."

"You didn't tell them," Bella asked in surprise.

I shrugged, but she couldn't see. "It wasn't my story to tell."

"Hhmm, maybe Alice should take a leaf out of your book," Bella said sharply.

Alice grimaced, but didn't respond. I was about to go mad trying to figure out what they were talking about, but gritting my teeth I fought down the Spanish Inquisition that was threatening to explode from my mouth.

"You ready Bella," I asked politely.

"Ready as I'll ever be," she replied with a small smile. "Let's just hope Emmett doesn't crush me before I even have a chance to say hello."

I chuckled, and swung the door open, watching for Emmett's and Jasper's reaction. When Bella walked into the room, the look of shock on their faces was probably close to what my own had been. It took less than three seconds for Emmett to react. Leaping up from his chair, he ran across the room sweeping Bella up into a huge bear hug. She froze in his arms, completely caught off guard. Realizing his mistake, Emmett immediately put her down, mumbling out an apology. To our surprise Bella just laughed.

"Emmett," she chided, "I'm blind not made of glass." And with that she opened up her arms.

Emmett burst out laughing and swung her up in his arms again. A flash of jealousy went through me, when I saw how freely Bella allowed Emmett to touch her.

"It's good to see you again, Bells. We've missed you around here," Emmett said sincerely.

"Yeah," piped in Jasper, "we've certainly missed you putting Edward in his place."

I scowled at him, as Bella blushed. Jasper carefully pulled her into a brotherly hug, whispering something in her ear, that made her blush even more. I shot him warning glance but he merely smirked.

"So," Bella said, trying to distract herself from whatever Jasper had told her, "is the famous Mrs. Emmett Cullen here? I'd like to give her my sympathies for having to up with you twenty-four, seven, Emmett. She must be one heck of a woman"

Rosalie's laugh rang through the room. "Your sympathies are unnecessary. I've learned to give these men a run for their money."

Bella held out her hand for Rosalie to take. "Bella Swan. It's a pleasure to meet any woman who can wrap these boys around her fingers."

"From what I understand, I'm not the only woman with such capabilities," Rosalie said with a genuine smile, pulling Bella into a hug.

"Ahem," a small voice sounded from the doorway.

Bella immediately turned toward the source of the sound, an apologetic look on her face. "Oh Alice," she exclaimed, "I completely forgot to introduce you, I'm so sorry. Alice this is everyone. Everyone this is Alice. She was my Orientation and Mobility instructor, and is currently fulfilling the role of the perfect roommate."

Alice smiled as she walked around shaking everyone hands; it didn't escape my notice that Jasper held her hand longer than necessary. Apparently I wouldn't be the only one hoping to get a phone number out of this meeting.

Soon the excitement had settled down and the meeting began. I was impressed at the advice that both Bella and Alice were able to give Rosalie on designing the floor plan to the building. They explained the importance of keeping it open, how changing the texture of the flooring would help with the navigation of the building and the importance of using sliding doors.

"Sliding doors make life so much easier," Bella had grumbled, getting a laugh out of everyone. "I've been caught off guard one to many times with some dumb kid slamming the door open just as I'm walking by. At least before I could see it coming, before the inevitable happened."

Overall the meeting went better than I had ever expected, but as it was drawing to a close I began to get more nervous. Would she expect my dinner proposal? I swallowed painfully, trying to moisten my suddenly dry mouth.

As Alice and Bella were about to stand up to leave, I finally worked up the courage to say something.

"Bella," I said softly, "can I speak to you for a minute?"

Even I was shocked at how fast the roomed cleared. Before Bella could even respond everyone else was rushing to the door. Bella must have heard them leaving in a frenzy, because she simply said in response, "Looks like I don't have much of choice."

I laughed nervously. "Look," I began once we were alone, "I know that I don't have much of right to ask anything of you, but to be perfectly honest when I saw you at the college the other day, I've never been so happy in my life."

She didn't say anything, just stared resolutely down at her fingers. I took a chance and walked over to her, sinking down in front of her onto my knees so that I was looking up into her face.

"I want a second chance Bella," I pleaded softly, taking her hands into mine. "I know that it is really more like a fiftieth chance, but I want it. I want to prove to you that I'm not the same Edward that I was three years ago. I want to show what this time apart has taught me."

I waited for a response, but she still just sat there, her eyes trying to focus on me. Her fingers tightened around mine infinitesimally, and I took courage from that.

"Do you think you could find it in your heart to give me another try?" I asked, holding my breath, waiting for the answer.

I could see that she was torn, and I wondered which way she would go. I reached up and took her face in my hands. "Please," I breathed across her face.

She relaxed and then taking a deep breath, nodded her head. I thought my heart would burst.

"Just please don't make me regret this Edward," she whispered softly.

"Never," I replied fervently. I knew the moment I said it, that it was the truth.

* * *

So, what did you think? Next chapter: Bella and Edward's first date . . . well sort of. 


	7. First Dates

**The things which do inspire,**

**This dear little writer;**

**Are the notes that you sire,**

**For my heart's desire.**

Thanks for all the reviews! Looking forward to reading more. 

**BPOV**

I was a mess. An utter and complete emotional disaster. Tonight was supposed to be mine and Edward's 'first' date and I was torn between two conflicting emotions. A part of me was dreading it; afraid that I would say to much and reveal to him my deepest secret; that I had bore his child. But the other, much louder part of me,was excited beyond belief. After three years of missing him, I would finally get the second chance I had, up until this point, only dreamed about. 

My mind was a million miles away as I walked through the hallway of the University after I had finished teaching my freshman writing course. It was probably for this reason that I stumbled over my own feet and began to fall backwards. 

Falling over was something I was fairly used to as I've never been a graceful person, although my cane had significantly lowered the amount of times I lost my footing. But falling over blind has to be one of the most scariest experiences in my life. Not knowing when you're going to make contact, or what you're going to make contact with, leaves my chest constricting in fear and my mind reeling with terror.

I was sure I was going to hurt myself when I felt two arms catch me around the waist, halting my descent before helping me straighten up again. 

"Miss," I heard a husky voice say in my ear, "are you alright?"

It took me a moment to answer, as I was still trying to calm myself from the near scare. 

"I'm fine," I finally managed to choke out after taking a few calming breaths. "Thank you for catching me, you can't understand how grateful I am right now. " I said with sincerity. 

"It really wasn't a problem," he said somewhat sheepishly and I felt him move so that he was standing in front of me, giving me my personal space. 

I held out my hand, "Well, you have my sincerest thanks . . ."

"Jacob," he said introducing himself, "Jacob Black."

"Bella Swan," I smiled in response, as his hand took mine. Why did his name sound so familiar? 

"Wait, Bella Swan?" he asked confused, "Your father wouldn't happen to Charlie Swan, chief of police in Forks, would it?"

"Oh my gosh, Jacob Black! You're Billy Black's son right," I exclaimed, recognition dawning on me. 

"Yeah, that's me. Wow talk about a small world," he said with a laugh. 

I chuckled. "You aren't kidding. So what are you up to?"

"Oh, I graduate next semester with my bachelor's in mechanical engineering. I would have finished earlier but I had to take care of my father, so I could only go part time for a while," he explained. "But, hey, while I'm with you, do you want any help getting to your destination. I know a near fall like that can be pretty scary." 

"Um, sure. I was just heading over to the Administration office to meet up with my friend, Alice."

I felt his elbow next to my arm a moment later and didn't hesitate to grab on to it, before he began leading me. 

"So you said to had to take care of your father," I asked. 

He hesitated a moment before answering. "Yeah, well, he's lost a lot of vision from his diabetes in the last couple of years. He's nearly blind. I needed to be around tohelp him make the adjustment."

"I amsorry to hear that. Trust me, I know how difficult that adjustment it, especially to the people around you," I said. "But, it does explain how well versed you are in handling the blind."

"What do you mean?"

"Well," I explained, "you'd be surprised at how many people could have made my recent near fall an extremely uncomfortable situation for me. Most people tend to be extremely and overbearingly helpful; painfully so. But you didn't hover at all. And then when you asked me if I wanted to be led somewhere you didn't grab my arm, you offered me your elbow. I can't tell you how many people assume that they should hold onto my elbow to guide me. It drives me crazy," I finished, the frustration clear in my voice.

He laughed. "I guess I never thought about that. It all just comes naturally to me, I suppose. Besides, if I was overbearingly helpful my dad might have kicked me out of the house and then where would he be?"

I laughed. "Probably walking into walls. Heaven knows how many times I did that. I drove Alice crazy for the first couple of days." 

"I'm guessing Alice was your OM? My dad had one of those."

"Yeah, my roommate now too. She's the one I'm meeting up with nowactually. So if you could keep my little stunt back in the hallway on the down low, I'd really appreciate it."

"No problem. Just consider me your partner in crime."

"Thanks Jacob."

"What does Alice look like?" He asked and then I heard a smack. "Well, I guess I'm not so well versed in the ways of the blind after all, cause that was a pretty dumb question."

"Did you just smack yourself in the head?" I asked

There was a sheepish silence for a moment. "You heard that huh?" 

I laughed. "No need to hit yourself, I know what Alice looks like from other people's descriptions of her. Just look for a tiny little girl, with short black hair. People say she looks like a pixie, but don't be fooled by her innocent expression. And whatever you do, don't let her near your hair."

"Why will she strap to a chair, and put my hair in curls?"

I looked up in the direction his voice was coming from, trying to look him the face. "You think I'm joking."

He gulped. "I think I can handle pixie girl. I think I see her up ahead actually and from what I can see, I could probably step on her by accident."

"I wouldn't underestimate her powers," I said with a grin. "She's a feisty one all right. But how tall are you anyway?"

"Six foot, seven."

"Woah, no wonder you sound so far away."

His laugh rang out. "I think you're the only person who could say that and get away with it."

I smirked. "The perks of being blind. You can lack all the tact in the world, but no one can say a word about it."

He chuckled, before I heard Alice's voice cut in, "What's so funny?"

I opened my mouth to say something, but Jacob cut in first. "Bella was just explaining how she likes to use her blindness as an excuse for bad behavior."

I removed his elbow from my grasp and folded my arms across my chest. "I said no such thing," I said with a pout. 

They both laughed at my antics. "Well, it was good to see you Bella," I heard Jacob say. "Hopefully I'll see you around."

"Right back at you. Say hi to Billy for me."

"Will do." And with that, I heard his departing footsteps. 

"So," Alice began, "who was that?" 

I shrugged my shoulders. "Jacob Black. His dad and my dad are really good friends. I ran into him in the hallway and he offered to walk me over here."

"Oh," she said, sounding surprised that it was such a simple explanation. "Well he is really good looking, just so you know."

I turned beat red. "Alice, he is an old family friend. Nothing more. Besides, he is a couple years younger than me anyway."

"Couldn't tell by looking at him. He's native American right?"

"Yeah, Quileute. He grew up on the reservation right next to Forks. You, know where my dad lives."

"I thought as much,"Alice responded. "Well missy, lets get you home. We've got to get you ready for the big date tonight."

I groaned. "Please keep it simple Alice. You know how much I hate your makeovers."

"Don't worry," she said in her singsong voice. "you will be _simply_ gorgeous."

* * *

Two hours, and three fights over shoes later, I was dressed and ready to go. My hair was in thick curls again, and I was wearing a simple skirt and sweater set, with ballet flats adorning my feet. I bounced Emmaline in my lap waiting for Edward to arrive. We had already moved all of her things out of the line of sight from the doorway, and Alice was going to take her back into one of the rooms when he arrived. 

While fighting with Alice over my outfit, I had all but been able to ignore the butterflies in my stomach. But now they were taking over. My nerves were steadily getting worse, and I wondered if I would even be coherent enough to even go on the date by the time he arrived. 

I concentrated on breathing as I flipped through a book with Emmaline. I couldn't read it for her, but I listened to her toddler vocabulary describe it, giving her words of encouragement. Just as I was beginning to calm myself, I heard the doorbell ring, and the butterflies went crazy again. 

I could feel Alice lifting Emmaline from my arms, and I swiftly kissed her goodbye. 

"Keep an open mind tonight Bella," was all Alice said as her footsteps headed toward Emmaline's bedroom. 

I made my way to the door, counting my steps to the keep track of my progress across the living room, only stopping when I felt the wood of the door against my outstretched fingertips. I unlocked the deadbolt and swung the door open catching the scent of Edward's cologne as I did so. It was amazing how as the scent swirled around me, so many memories flooded my mind, both good and bad. 

"Hello Edward," I greeted him. 

"How did you know it was me?" he asked, the curiosity evident in his voice. 

"Well, other than the fact that I was expecting you to arrive right at this time, I have my ways. But a lady never reveals her secrets."

He sighed. "There was a time when you didn't have any secrets from me."

"Yes, there was a time," I agreed softly. 

There was silence for a moment, before he asked, "Are you ready to go then?"

"Yes," I replied, reaching for my cane by the door frame, "I just need to grab my cane."

But as my hands wrapped around my cane, I felt his hands holding my own still. 

"You won't be needing that this evening," he whispered softly in my ear, making me shiver. 

"Edward," I started, but his fingers were suddenly over my lips, shushing me. 

"I promise I won't let you go all evening. Trust me, you won't need it."

I sighed and accepted the elbow he offered to me. 

"Is this the easiest way for you," he asked concerned. "I noticed that this is how Alice did it."

I was surprised. I didn't realize he had been watching me that closely. It sent a wave of conflicting emotions within me. "Yes this is the easiest way," I finally answered. 

There was silence between us as we walked to his car. A nervous silence on my part, a fear of saying too much. Emmaline was such a huge part of my life, I was still unsure of how to talk to him without spilling the secret.

He carefully helped me into the car, going at my speed. As the car purred to life and I was surprised how familiar the sound of his Volvo starting was. The silence stretched on as I frantically searched for something safe to talk about. 

"So where are you taking me?" I asked finally, figuring that was a safe enough topic. 

He chuckled. "Still don't like surprises I see."

"No, but I am far more accustomed to them. Not being able to see means I run, and I mean literally run into surprises all the time."

He didn't say anything in response. And the silence was making nervous. 

I heard him start to say something, but then he hesitated. I waited patiently to for him to continue. 

"Bella," he finally began, "can I ask you something that's kind of personal? You don't have to answer if you don't want to."

"It's fine Edward, ask away," I reassured him with a small smile. 

"How did you cope? I mean when you realized that you were blind?" his voice was strained. 

I took a moment to answer; collecting my thoughts, deciding how and what to explain to him. 

"At first I was really angry," I began. "You know how stubborn I can be and how much I like my independence, so it was really hard for me to accept the fact that I had lost so much freedom. I couldn't drive anymore, I had to be taught how to dress myself again, how to do my hair, put onmake-up --not that I wore much to begin with-- but still. I lost so much freedom. I couldn't even pick up a book to read anymore."

I took out a deep breath, "But most of all I was angry at myself. Angry that I had taken everything for granted. That I had taken seeing the faces of the one's I love for granted. I think that fact still hurts the most. Alice and my mother really helped me through the first couple of months. Alice especially. She helped me rediscover a little of the independence I had lost." 

I paused again; trying to organize my emotions and thought. "But you asked how I coped. To be honest, I don't know how. I think I just take it day by day, hoping that it will all work out."

He didn't respond to my confession, but instead just reached across to hold my hand, rubbing soothing circles across my palm whenever he could, until I felt him park the car. 

"We're here," he announced. 

"And where exactly is here," I asked. 

He didn't answer, but I heard him open the door and shut it behind him. Only a couple of seconds went by before I heard my door open and his hand was once again on mine, helping me out. 

"Well," he began, as if he was afraid of my reaction, "I figured I owed you a dinner at the little French restaurant you've always wanted to go to."

I froze. I was surprised he had remembered after all these years apart. He seemed to sense my shock and confusion, because of what he said next. 

"I remember that night very well, Bella. Better than I care to say."

I knew what night he was referring to and I couldn't help but blanch. It had been one of the worst nights of my life. I'm not sure what the expression on my face was, but it must have worried him, because he immediately began to back track. 

"I didn't say that to upset you Bella," he almost pleaded, the frustration evident in his voice. "I was just trying to show you the effect your words had on me. That's all I swear."

I smiled up at him, or at least what I hope was him. "It's okay Edward, I was just surprised that you remembered," I assured him. "And if you don't stop raking your hand through your hair, you are going to go prematurely bald," I added. 

There was a brief silence, before he blurted out, "how did you know?"

"I may be blind Edward," I said, "but I still remember your body language fairly well."

He laughed, and began to lead me forward. I felt the wind rush on my face as we walked through an open door.The change in temperature let me know that we were inside. 

The aura of the restaurant was relaxing. Soft classical music was playing inthe background;the sounds of various conversations going on and the clink of metal on china plates flooded my senses. 

I was suddenly aware of Edward leading me somewhere, carefully maneuvering me, giving me verbal warnings if we were about to step down. He stopped in front of what I assumed was our table. 

He led me to the chair so that my knees were touching it, placing one of my hands on the back of my chair and the other on the table, so that I could sit down on my own. 

"How did you know what to do?" I asked him, curious as to how he knew how to handle to the situation so well.

He coughed uncomfortably. "I might have talked to Alice beforehand," he finally admitted. 

I was going to have a serious talk with that girl. 

The waiter interrupted us just then. "What would you like to drink tonight?"

"White wine, as usual, Bella?" Edward asked. 

"Yes please."

Edward placed our drink orders and as soon as the waiter left, he began to read the menu out loud for me. I found myself getting caught up in the gentle cadence of his voice, not paying any attention at all to what he was reading. 

Despite this I still managed to order, eggplant roulade served with pasta and marinara sauce. Our conversation during dinner was light and simple. We talked about our work and I wasglad to hear how well the business was doing. He caught me up on Emmett's wedding to Rosalie, and his stories about Emmett's bachelor party had me putting my hand over my mouth to keep my laughter from bursting out. I talked about my part-time job at the University. Edward was especially curious about the computer programs I used to translate my students' papers into braille. 

I felt myself growing more and more comfortable with each passing second, which frightened me. I had given two years to this man and he had never appreciated me and I didn't want to trust him so quickly. I had to keep reminding myself to be careful, but as the evening continued on, it got harder and harder to keep the walls up. 

The easy conversation continued until we were back in the car.Then silence enveloped us again, a more comfortable silence than before, but still encroached upon by unanswered questions from both parties. As Edward put the car into park again in front of what I assumed was my condo, I could sense that he was trying to formulate a question. 

"Just ask me Edward," I finally whispered. 

"Why," he finally asked, "why didn't you tell me what was going on? Not even a phone call. I could have been there for you Bella. I would have helped in anyway that I could."

"I'm not ready to answer that question completely Edward," I admitted. "But part of it was that I know how much you love playing the hero Edward. You're too chivalrous for your own good sometimes. I knew that you had called looking for me, and I didn't want you to know for fear that you would take me back simply because you would feel obligated to. I was afraid that eventually you would resent me for forcing you to settle down." I was whispering by the time I finished. 

"You thought I would resent you?" he asked, his voice betraying his anger, but I could tell it was reflected inwardly and not at me. I still cringed though. 

"You gave me no reason to think otherwise Edward. You made your feelings on marriage very clear when we were together. I still don't have a reason to think otherwise," I said softly. 

He was tense. I pictured him pinching the bridge of his nose with his thumb and forefinger like he did when he was angry and didn't know what to say. 

"And what makes you think I haven't changed," he finally asked, his voice bitter. 

I bit my lip. I wasn't sure how to ask my next question, or even sure if I really wanted to ask it. 

"Edward, how many women have you been with since we broke up?"

A stony, uncomfortable silence met my response. 

"That's not a fair question," he finally said. 

I bristled. It must have been worse than I thought. I felt all my walls go up again immediately. "It's a perfectly fair question. You say you've changed, but old habits are hard to break. I won't be your pity case," I said harshly. 

He was running his hands through his hair again. I could hear it. But I didn't care that I had upset him. I didn't care that I had made him uncomfortable. I had given him two years of my life, I wasn't about to give him anymore until I was completely sure. But despite the fact that I had already guessed his answer, it still hurt knowing I had been so easily replaced. I could feel the tears pricking at my eyes. 

It seemed like an eternity before he finally responded. "Bella, I don't believe that an apology even comes close to how much I owe you. For the two years we were together I never truly saw you, appreciated you and loved you the way I should have. It is something that I will regret for the rest of my life.But when you broke up with me that night, everything took a different perspective. It was as if I had to lose you in order to understand just how much I was taking for granted."

I felt his hand tentatively touch mine. I didn't fight it, but I didn't respond to it either. I was still waiting for a reason to. 

"I was so ashamed that night. Ashamed at how horribly I had treated you without even realizing it. That is why it took me six months for me to call you. I didn't feel like I deserved a second chance. And then when you never called me back, I gave up hope. I realized too late that you were everything I wanted, everything I needed."

He sighed heavily and tightened his grip on my hand. "I know its a poor excuse, but I've spent the last two years trying every way to get you out of my head. None of it worked, but I had to try. It was painful to think about you, and how much I had lost when you left. I don't know how I'm going to make it up to you Bella, but I'll find a way to show you how much I've changed. You have never been and never will be just a pity case to me. Not ever. If anything I'm the damsel in distress in the relationship."

He paused, trying to gouge my reaction I'm sure. But I didn't know what to sayto this confession. Suddenly I felt his lips on my cheek. 

"Please, give me a chance Bella," he breathed against my skin. 

I took all my self control to not turn my lips to meet his. Instead I simply nodded. And for the first time, I felt my heart stir with hope.

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A/N: Sorry I'm late on the update, but it took me longer to write this than I thought, and I'm not sure that I'm entirely happy with, but I couldn't make you guys wait any longer. Thank you so much for the reviews I have received. They mean a lot. Let me know what you think! 


	8. Dinner and a Secret

**It was very painful for me to find**

**That less than .05 share what's on their mind**

**So please put me out of my misery,**

**And write down your many thoughts for me.**

So sorry it took me so long to update. . . midterm week, what can I say? The joys of getting a higher education . . . anyway, enjoy this chapter . . . big turning point in the story.

Thank you for your reviews and your patience, they are very much appreciated.

I promise to have the next chapter up by the end of the week!

Cheers!

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**Disclaimer: **Don't own Twilight

**EPOV**

She was hiding something from me. I knew it. It was evident in the way she would start to say something only to suddenly break off and try to cover up what ever she was about to say. It was beginning to drive me crazy.

I understood that three years apart would mean that she would have secrets from me, three years is after all, a very long time. But I knew this secret had to be huge; that was made evident by all the times she almost accidentally let it slip. I was sorely tempted on several occasions to call her out on it, but I never did. I didn't have any right to be privy to information she wasn't willing to share with me.

But it was tearing me up inside. I was working on trying to repair our broken relationship and this secret of hers was a huge space between us, keeping us from moving forward. For the past three weeks I had seen her everyday. We had gone out to dinner, met up for lunch, walked along the beach, attended a concert, cuddled in our coffee shop, talked about everything, our past, our present . . . but this secret of hers was keeping us from talking about the future.

I had been completely honest with her. Answered every question no matter how much it had made me squirm. Why couldn't she do the same for me? What was she so intent on hiding.

Currently, Bella and I were on a double date with Alice and Jasper who had hit it off after the first meeting. I had really grown to like Alice in the last few weeks. Despite her quirkiness, she was such an optimistic person that she was like a little bouncing ball of energy. I was infinitely indebted to her for all the help that she had given me. She had been secretly instructing me on the best ways to help Bella without seeming overbearing or inadequate.

I glanced between her and Jasper, smiling at the perfect match they seemed to make. Alice was the perfect balance to Jasper's usual mellowness and level headedness. I shook my head, bringing me out of my wallowing and into the present.

"Alice," Bella was saying, "you are too vindictive and don't you even try to deny it."

"Bella," she responded feigning shock, "how could you accuse of such a thing?"

"Two words Alice, security-guard."

Jasper and I looked between each other, both confused, as Alice immediately turned several shades of red, a feat I had only known Bella to accomplish up to this point.

"So are one of you going to explain the significance behind those two words, or are you going to leave us hanging?" Jasper finally asked, piqued.

Bella smiled sweetly at Alice, if it wasn't for her wandering gaze, you would have never known she was blind, because she looked directly at her. "Do you want to tell the story Alice, or should I?"

Alice huffed, but grudgingly gave in. "Fine, Bella, but I'll get even with you for this."

"No you won't, you're just saying that to make me feel better," Bella responded cheekily.

"Anyway," Alice said, ignoring the jib, "one day I was at the mall buying some shoes to go with a new dress I had just purchased. Everything was fine until the alarm went off as I was leaving the store. I had the receipt in my hands and was ready to show the sales clerk that this was all a mistake when this perverted, idiotic sleaze-ball of a security guard showed up." Alice's voice had grown harsher with each insult.

"Wow, your getting creative in your insults Alice," Bella interjected with a laugh. "Usually you just stick with asshole and leave it at that."

Alice ignored her sly remark and continued on."As I was saying, before I was so rudely interrupted," Alice said in a hard voice, sending a glare toward Bella, "I held out the receipt trying to show him that it was just a simple mistake, but he was too busy grabbing my wrist and dragging me back to the store, ranting about dang hoodlums and how they think they have a right to anything."

"Well you are kind of small for your age Alice," Bella piped up again, the smirk on her face more pronounced.

Alice snorted. "Small for my age or not, he insisted that he was going to have to frisk me in order to make sure I hadn't stolen any shoes from the store. I lost it at that point and yelled at him, asking how I was supposed to hide shoes in my clothes when I was wearing skinny jeans and spandex shirt.

" That didn't seem to faze him and the only thing that saved me from having his grimy hands all over me, was that the cashier finally stepped in and told him it was her fault. Needless to say I've never seen such a disappointed face." Alice sighed dramatically. Her face in such a heartbreaking expression I had to choke back a laugh. I noticed Jasper doing the same.

Bella laughed. "So Alice being Alice," she informed us, "decided that it wasn't enough to simply complain to customer services about him. Oh no, absolute public humiliation leading to his ultimate demise was the only thing fit for him."

"So what did you do?" Jasper asked growing impatient.

Alice's face broke into a mischievous smile. "Oh I planned his public humiliation with the help of Bella and her mother." She laughed evilly, rubbing her hands together as she relayed the story.

"I had Bella and her mother, Renae, come to the mall with me the next day. Once we found where he was stationed, we went into a clothing store close to his position. I, of course, couldn't directly participate because it would provoke suspicion so I found a bench with a good view of the store and sat down to watch my plan unfold. Bella and Renae went into the store and when no one was looking Renae put a shirt on top of Bella's bag, making it look like it had accidentally been knocked on to it."

"And then I walked out of the store, seeming oblivious to it," Bella interjected, her face alight with humor.

"You didn't," I asked surprised, realization of the plot dawning on me.

"Oh, but we did," Alice chuckled. "Turned out better than I could have ever hoped for, too. The alarms went off and of course he coming running. Being the idiot that he was he didn't notice the cane in Bella's hand and immediately grabbed her by the wrist and started pulling her into the store. She stumbled and then started crying."

"I didn't know you had it in you," I said turning to Bella.

She just smiled and said with a shrug, "You know how easily my tear ducts are worked up."

"Then came in Renae," Alice said, a blissful expression on her face. "She gave an absolutely phenomenal performance; academy award worthy, really. She marched right up the man and starting screaming in his face to get his hands off of her daughter. She kept yelling at him about how stupid he could be to not notice that she was blind.

"She made such a scene that the manager of the mall showed up. Renae wasn't even miffed. She just started throwing around words like assault and yelling about the lack of regard toward the handicapped and threatening lawsuits. And the whole time Bella was just standing there, red faced, with tears in her eyes. It was beautiful."

"What happened to the guy?" Jasper asked, his voice marred somewhat by his laughing.

"Well after being forced to give an apology, I never saw him in the vicinity of the mall again," Alice concluded, a satisfied smirk on her face.

"Alice," I said with a laugh, "remind me to never get on your bad side."

Jasper nodded in agreement, his frame still shaking as he admired the fierce little pixie sitting next to him.

As we began to wrap up our meals, we started discussing what we would all like to do next. I noticed Bella stiffen when the subject came up. As Jasper, Alice and I began to throw out ideas I couldn't help but glance at her somewhat morose expression. Not knowing what was wrong I took her hand in mine, rubbing my thumb across her knuckles in an effort to soothe whatever the problem was.

She turned to me and gave me a small smile in my direction. I leaned over to whisper in her ear, "What's wrong Bella?" before placing my ear at her lips, waiting for her to respond.

"I just feel like a burden at times like these," she whispered back, her voice self-deprecating and reluctant. "Your options are extremely limited simply because I'm involved."

I softly placed my hands on either side of her face, ignoring of the audience sitting across from us, to whisper softly to her "Don't you think like that for a second Bella. You never have been and never will be a burden. Understand?"

She sighed and nodded, and even though she was simply doing it to appease me, I knew it was the best I was going to get. I reclaimed her hand again, joining back into the conversation Jasper and Alice were having. Alice caught my eye and sent me a grateful look, I merely nodded in response.

"Hey," Jasper suddenly said, "why don't we go back to your apartment ladies. I'm sure you guys have some games or movies we could watch, right?"

For such a simple suggestion I was shocked by Bella's response. She stiffened immediately her eyes growing wide with terror while her breathing hitched.

"I don't think that's a good idea," she squeaked out.

"Why not," Jasper asked, his eyes wide with curiosity, startled by her reaction.

"Yes Bella," Alice said, her voice innocent . . . too innocent, "why not?"

Bella's face went from terrified to livid in about three second flat, the hand I was currently holding clenched mine, unconsciously, in fury and I winced as her nails dug a little into my skin.

"Well, Alice," Bella responded, the anger in her voice evident and unchecked. "I just think that since we are already out we should go and do something fun. I don't want us to have to go back to the apartment simply because of my disability."

Alice didn't even flinch. "If that is what you want Bella," Alice said coldly. I looked between the two of them, trying to figure out what was going on. I saw Jasper doing the same.

"It is," Bella responded just as harshly.

"What the hell is going on here," I finally asked, irritated that I couldn't figure out what they were hinting at.

"Nothing Edward," Bella sighed. "I'm just being a little sensitive that's all. Sorry."

And with that, the topic was closed for discussion. I looked between Alice and Bella, trying to think about what the connotations of their words could possibly be. I looked up at Jasper, but he was just as clueless as I was.

The tension in the air was tangible, but began to dissipate when we decided to go the boardwalk. We all got up to leave and I gave Bella my elbow to hold on to. It wasn't something I had to think about anymore, it came so naturally.

As we walked out of the restaurant we passed by another couple just coming in.

"Bella?" the man asked as we walked by. I immediately tensed and looked up at him. That's right, looked up at him. The man was huge, at least six, six if not taller.

Bella's brow furrowed in confusion, trying to place his voice, I'm sure. Then she smiled.

"Jacob?" she asked tentatively.

He chuckled. "The one and only. Should I be offended that you were just going to walk by without saying anything."

"Yes," she said without hesitation. But the small smile playing at her lips gave her away. I slipped an arm around her waist, claiming her as mine. I surprised myself at how jealous I was.

My actions, seemed to remind her of my presence. "Oh, Jacob, this is Edward," she said introducing me. "Edward this is Jacob. His father is Billy Black, one of my father's good friends."

I relaxed recognizing the name. I held a hand out and he took it giving me a friendly shake. "Good to meet you Jacob," I said politely.

"Right back at you," he said just as warmly. "Bella, Edward, this is Leah." He said motioning to the girl with him.

Leah gave a small smile, her hand entwined with Jacobs. "Good to meet you both," she said softly.

Bella and I gave our greetings before Jacob continued, "Oh hey Bella, I went home last weekend and Billy and Charlie send their greetings. Charlie wanted me to tell you that he wants to come by and see his granddaughter. So he wants you to call him with a good day for him to drive up and see you both."

Time seemed to stop. I couldn't seem to understand what he meant. Before I could stop myself I blurted out, "Granddaughter?" my voice betraying my disbelief.

"Yeah," Jacob said, seemingly oblivious to Bella's pale face and tense posture and my own shocked expression. "Cute little thing too. Charlie showed me a picture of her. She had the prettiest little auburn curls with green eyes to match . . ." his voice trailed off as he looked at me, his eyes growing wide in recognition, taking in my appearance.

I had no idea what my face looked like. But I'm sure it was a combination of shock, disbelief and horror. Beside me, Bella didn't look much better. Her entire fame was quivering, from what emotion I couldn't be sure, but I'm sure it was partly terror.

"I'll be sure to call him, thanks Jacob," Bella finally managed to choke out.

Jacob and Leah, at this point were looking extremely uncomfortable. Jacob finally coughed, and muttered, "I guess we'll be going then," before he dragging Leah all the way inside the restaurant.

Bella and I stood there at the doorway to go outside. My mind was reeling, trying to take in the information that Jacob had just shared with me. Auburn hair, green eyes.

"You have a daughter," I whispered in disbelief.

Before Bella could respond, Alice can barging back into the restaurant, Jasper in tow.

"What are you guys . . ." but she never finished her question, her eyes growing wide with worry as she saw mine and Bella's expressions.

"What happened," she demanded, her voice betraying her concern.

I simply looked at Bella again. "How old is she," I finally asked. "Your daughter?" I unconsciously, held my breath as I waited for a response.

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A/N: PLEASE REVIEW! LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THINK!


	9. Fights

**If I may be so bold to say,**

**Reading your reviews makes my day.**

**So press that button if you please,**

**It helps my mind to be at ease. **

_I just want to personally thank everyone who reviewed the last chapter! I freaked my roommate out when I started clapping my hands with delight, because of how many I had received! Your reviews keep me writing, so NEVER hesitate to drop a word in! Thank you, thank you, thank you!_

P.S.: A lot of you have mentioned concerns about Jacob Black being in the story . . . let me assure you that there is not going to be any Jacob: Bella: Edward conflict. His character was merely a means to an end. He may be mentioned or brought in sometime later, but he and Bella are strictly friends

P.P.S. I know I said this update would be up yesterday but I went the Festival of Colors yesterday and ended up with colored chalk coming out my ears! If any of you ever get the chance to go to this . . . don't hesitate! It is so much fun!

So anyway . . . on to the next chapter.

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**Disclaimer: **Don't own Twilight

**BPOV: **

I was hyperventilating. I could feel the world start to spin. Try as I might I couldn't form the words to answer his question.

"Bella," Edward said again, his voice stern. "How old is your daughter?"

I opened my mouth, but no words came out. I wanted so badly to see his face, to read the emotions in his eyes that I knew so well. But I couldn't.

The silence was becoming unbearable. Everything felt so surreal.

"She almost two and half." A voice whispered. Was it mine? I couldn't be sure.

"Is she mine?"

Here it was, the moment of truth.

"Yes."

A sharp intake of breath, a harsh voice. "When were you planning on telling me?"

A whispered response. "I don't know."

All the sudden I felt his hands on both of my arms pulling me toward him, I could feel his body pressed tightly against mine, his anger evident in his body language. His hot breath fanned across my face, the scent of cloves and garlic overwhelmed me.

"So this is what you've been hiding. Everything makes sense now. Why you never wanted me to come over to your condo. Why you and Alice would have wordless arguments in front of me. Why you would sometimes break off in the middle of a sentence."

His voice is ragged with emotion. Pain and fury were the most prominent. "Why Bella? Why did you keep her from me?"

I wanted to cry. I wanted so badly to tell him how I was afraid to lose him. But for some reason I found myself saying, "You know why Edward."

His anger is palpable; his grip on my arms tightens and I held back a wince.

"No, actually I don't. Why don't you enlighten me on why you would keep a father from his child."

I could feel my own anger growing; I was growing defensive. He had no right to be talking to me like that.

"How can you even ask that Edward? You can't even look at a baby without grimacing with disgust. If you thought for one second that I was going to let _my daughter_ be around someone who would look at her that way your crazy." It was a low blow, and I knew it. But I couldn't take it back now that it was out.

I felt him take a deep breath, no doubt getting ready to yell at me some more. But before he could get out whatever he was about to say, Alice interrupted.

"Um, I know that you two are having a much needed argument right now, but this is not the place to do it. The manager from the restaurant is looking through the doors at you as we speak. At least let us go outside." Although pleading, her voice was still firm.

I felt his grip on me loosen and I stumbled backward from his arms. Alice held on to my elbow, dragging me out the door. We headed back the cars in silence, no one knowing quite what to say. But I could feel Edward behind me, stewing in his anger.

"She's not just yours you know," Edward said bitterly. "I'm her father. She mine too."

For someone reason, his comment sent me over the edge. I had given him two years to prove himself worthy of being a father figure and he had failed miserably. Emmaline was mine and mine alone. I had gone through the pregnancy without his help. I had given birth to her without his help. I had fed her, rocked her to sleep, and was in the process of raising her all without his help. I was furious that he would try to take her from me. So I said the first words that came to mind.

Whirling around to where his voice had come from, I hissed into the cold night air. "The only part of her that belongs to you is her DNA. You've been nothing but a sperm donor in her life."

My words sparked his anger again, bringing it the forefront. "And whose fault is that?" he roared. His breath made it clear that he was inches from my face.

"Yours," I screamed back at him. "It's all yours. I gave you two years. Two whole years and you never appreciated me. Not once. You may love me now, but you didn't love me then. So excuse me for taking all means necessary to protect myself and MY daughter from your selfishness."

We were going for blood now. Passion and anger completely drowning out reason.

"Quit acting like the victim here. You know perfectly well that if I had known about the pregnancy I never would have let you go through it alone. You chose to go through it alone. You chose to keep me from MY child these last two years. I am just as much a victim as you," his voice was laced with fury.

"Yeah I'm sure you would have taken us back in Edward," I bit out insultingly. "But how long would it have taken for you to hate us for saddling you with the life you so vocally despised."

His hands were on my arms again, pinning them to my sides. He shook me ever so slightly.

"How many times do I have to tell you?" he said vehemently, his voice growing louder with each word. "I never would have resented you. Dammit Bella, quit using that as an excuse."

I was about to yell something back at him, but he abruptly let me go. "You know what?" he asked rhetorically, and I could hear the effort he was making to keep his voice civil. "I can't do this anymore tonight."

I heard his footsteps walking away and then silence. The only sound was that of my heavy breathing. I stood there for an immeasurable amount of time. Running over everything we had yelled at each other. Try as I might I couldn't absolve myself of any fault, and the guilt was beginning to get me.

I felt a small hand on my arm. Alice.

"Come on Bella, let's go home," she said softly, her voice soothing.

I felt the tears begin to slide down my cheeks and I raised a hand to wipe them away, but they just kept coming. Soon I was crying, sobbing as the guilt from the evening racked my body.

I felt arms wrap around me, and lift me into the car; Jasper.

I'm not sure how I got home. But all the sudden I was aware that I was on my bed, Alice's arms wrapped around me.

I took a deep breath. "You were right Alice, you were right."

Alice didn't say anything just continued to rub my back soothingly.

"I should have told him sooner. I shouldn't have kept it from him for so long."

"Then why did you?" she asked softly.

I sniffled. Sitting up properly and wiping my cheeks clean of tears I leaned back against the headboard to my bed.

"I don't know Alice," I finally conceded. "I guess I was afraid. Afraid because things have been going so well these last few weeks and I didn't want it to end."

There was silence. "Alice, do you think he'll come back?"

She sighed. "Of course he'll come back Bella. His reaction tonight was just in response to being confused and overwhelmed to the news. Give him some time to work it out. I've watched him over these last few weeks. He loves you very much."

I could feel the tears coming again. "I hope your right Alice. I hope this doesn't ruin us. I should have listened to you in the first place." I shook my head. "Never bet against Alice," I mumbled pathetically.

She chuckled and patted me on the back. "Do you need anything before I go to bed."

"Could you bring Emmaline in here?" I asked. "I want to hold her tonight."

"Sure Bella." The bed moved as she got up, and just a minute later she was placing Emmaline's sleeping form in my arms.

I cuddled next to my daughter, her small frame warm and comforting. Burying my face into her curls, l managed to slip into a restless sleep, knowing she was safe in my arms; a constant reminder of why I was still here, of my purpose.

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I woke up the next morning and immediately noticed the absence of my daughter.

"Emmaline?" I called out. But there was no response.

"Alice?" Still no response.

Reaching out I placed my hand on the nightstand next to my bed. Sure enough next to my alarm clock, was the tell-tale tape recorder.

I picked it up, felt for the play button and listened to Alice's message.

"Hey sleepyhead," Alice's chipper voice rang from the speakers. "I figured you could use some peace and quiet time this morning, so Angela and I took the liberty of taking Emmaline out for the day! We'll be back early in the afternoon, so take this time to relax! Call if you need anything."

I shook my head, but took her advice. My clock told me that it was only ten in the morning so I still had quite a few hours to myself. And Alice was right, I need some time to think.

With my thoughts as my only companions for the morning as I got myself read to face the day, I was able to come to a conclusion. I wasn't going to keep anymore secrets from Edward. When he came back – I couldn't stand to use the word "if, even in my mind – I was going to be completely honest with him. No more secrets.

As I sat on the couch wallowing in these gloomy thoughts, trying to find a solution to the mess I had inadvertently made, there was a knock on the door. I was so wrapped up in my thoughts that it took a moment for me to process, and by the time I began making my way to the door, the knocking had become more insistent and desperate.

"Come on Bella, please open up. I know you're home," a voice I knew well called through the door. Edward.

I unconsciously held my breath. Even though I had decided to be completely honest with him when he came back, I was still so nervous of his reaction. He had seemed so angry and betrayed, I feared that he wouldn't ever forgive me, and that was something I was sure I could never live with.

So with hesitant fingers I carefully undid the latch and opened the door. I got my answer soon enough. The second the door opened I was in his arms and he was kissing me. And this wasn't a chaste kiss like the ones we had been sharing for the past month; no, this kiss knocked the breath out of me and left me weak at the knees. In this simple kiss I could feel his love for me, feel his need.

We had a long road ahead, but this kiss assured me that we were both in for the long haul.

* * *

A/N: Did I get so many reviews last time because of the big cliffhanger, or because of my unashamed pleading for them? Well . . . whatever works, right? Much love to my readers who send a hallmark message my way . . . and to those of you that don't . . . I still love you anyway; you just get a smaller cookie . . . cheers. Next update: hopefully no later than Wednesday.


	10. Author's Note

I really hate it when authors do this, but I'm afraid to say that this is not an update. You see I'm down to the final crunch right now in all of my classes with finals starting on Saturday; so I'm sorry to say that my fanfiction story is sitting on the back burner right now. I really am very sorry, and I'm trying really hard to find the time to post an update by the end of the week but I don't want to make any promises I can't keep.

But rest be assured when my semester ends, you can expect regular updates . . .


	11. A Frat Boy Mans Up

By putting down your words in ink,

You're letting me know just what you think.

So jot down a short note for me,

Or else you'll get a visit from a yeti.

Disclaimer: Don't own Twilight

**EPOV**

I was furious. I was livid. I was every word that described a state of aggravation so acute that it would make a normally peaceful person want to just kick the crap out of something . . . anything. I pulled over to the side of the road knowing I was too angry to drive. Slamming the door shut I stormed down the sidewalk, hands shoved in my pockets, as my mind mulled over everything that had just happened.

I was still processing the information I had gathered from our chance encounter with Jacob. I had a daughter. A daughter. I couldn't comprehend it. It was too much to take in. I couldn't wrap my brain around it. I was father. Me, a dad. But was I really?

I bitterly thought back at what Bella had told me, that I was nothing but a sperm donor. I cringed internally at the truth of her words. Not only had she been left to raise our child on her own, but she had been blind while doing it.

"Argh," I groaned in frustration as I kicked the curb hoping to release all of the pent up anger within me. I immediately regretted it as shooting pain shot up my leg, but I ignored it, hunching my shoulders again as I continued my angry walk down the street.

A wave of sadness passed over me when in the middle of my angry ranting, I recalled what she had said when I asked her what she missed the most about not being able to see. Now her statement about not be able to see the faces of the ones she loved held so much more meaning. She would literally, never be able to see her--no, _our _daughter grow up.

I was going to make this up to her. I had no idea how, but I was going to. She had to understand that I was never going to leave her, or resent her. It sickened me that she had honestly believed that I would resent her and my own daughter.

_But did you give her any reason to think otherwise_, I thought bitterly to myself. Recalling the two years that we had spent together. I thought back on all the times I had watched her hold a baby while I hung back a look of disgust on my face. Or all the times I had demanded that we change booths in a restaurant simply because a family with young children had been seated too close. Yes, I had given her every reason to keep that secret from me. And I hated myself for it.

But I wasn't the same person then as I was now. I wasn't some fresh out of college frat boy who was afraid of the responsibility. Because in truth, I was afraid. I held both my father and mother in the highest esteem and the fear of not being able to be the same parental figure to my own children as they had been to me was, well . . . terrifying. So instead of admitting my fears I reacted negatively to any situation that would bring them into the light.

But even though I was scared out of my mind of being a father I knew that I had to do it. I didn't have any more time to wallow in my own insecurities. I had to man up.

This conclusion hit me so swiftly. I knew what I had to do. I had to be there for Bella. I had to be there for my daughter.

Turning around I half ran back my car, with the sudden desire to see Bella washing over me. Jamming my keys into the ignition, my car purred to life and I grabbed my phone from off the passenger seat to call her.

But when I flipped my phone open I saw that I had several missed calls from Jasper, and the events of the night flooded back into my consciousness. Angrily I banged my head against the steering wheel. Could I have been a bigger ass?

With a sigh I called Jasper's number, preparing myself for the tongue lashing I was sure to get. His phone rang once, twice and then a third time; I was starting to hope that he wasn't going to answer when all the sudden his voice screamed into my ear.

"Where the hell are you?" his voice was livid. "Actually, I don't care where you are, because all that matters is where you should be."

"Jasper, calm down," I said as calmly as I could manage.

"Calm down! You are telling me to calm down?" I had to hold the phone away from my ear he was yelling so loud. "You don't get to tell me to calm down. I just carried your girlfriend into her room because she was crying so hard she couldn't walk. I have half a mind to call Emmett and come beat you up myself!"

"And I'd deserve it," I yelled back into the phone, hoping to shut him up. "Look, I know I screwed up, really screwed up, but I little overwhelmed, okay? How would you like to find out that you're a dad nearly three years after the fact?"

"That's still no excuse for your behavior," Jasper argued back.

"You only say that because you're not me," I said bitterly. He was about to quip out a smart remark back, but I didn't want to hear it.

"I'm going to fix this Jasper, you don't have anything to worry about that. I'm not going to let her down again," I promised more to myself than anyone else.

"And when are you planning this little fixer-upper party," he demanded.

"Tonight," I responded, pulling out into traffic, "I'm on my way right now."

There was a long pause. "You might want to call Alice."

"Why?"

"Well first off, Bella was pretty upset after you left. Like I said, I had to carry her because she was crying so hard. And second, it's nearly two in the morning. I don't think either of them would appreciate you banging down the door at this hour."

"That still doesn't explain to me why I should call Alice," I said, taking in all the information he had just given me; cringing at the damage I had caused.

"You need to call Alice so that you and Bella can talk without any interruptions. I know Alice well enough by now that I'm sure she could arrange that."

I had to admit he was right. With a sigh I turned the car around and headed back to my place.

"Thanks Jasper," I said, hoping he could hear my sincerity. "I'll give Alice a call. Thanks."

"I don't need you to thank me, I need you to take care of Bella and your daughter." And with that he hung up.

His statement left sent my mind in a frenzy again. _My daughter. _It still didn't seem real.

* * *

I was standing outside of Bella's condo. I had called Alice right after I got of the phone with Jasper and she had told me that Bella would be home alone during the late morning, early afternoon hours. But just because she was home alone, didn't mean that she would be willing to talk to me.

Working up the courage I finally, hesitantly knocked on the door. When there was no response, I knocked again, harder. But this was still no response. Panicking I starting knocking harder and louder, desperate for her to open the door so that I could make things right.

"Come on Bella, please open up. I know you're home," I called through door, hoping she would answer my plea.

Soon enough I heard the lock on the door click, and slowly the door opened to reveal a set of beautiful brown eyes that were widened in confusion and worry. I didn't mean to kiss her then, but I couldn't help it. I wanted one real kiss before she could possibly kick me to the curb.

Pulling her tightly into my arms I kissed her with everything I had. Victory was mine when she responded in kind and I felt an electric current sweep through me as I kissed her . . . and I mean really kissed her, for the first time in three years.

I realized then that even if she did try to kick me to the curb, she wouldn't succeed, because I wasn't going anywhere. They may accuse Bella of being the stubborn one but I can be just as obstinate and immovable. And on this issue I wasn't budging. I would make her mine and together we would raise our daughter.


End file.
